Well I’m home. Not liking it one bit! I miss my little cottage, the ocean, the beach, the ability to go for a walk in bare feet along the warm sand and whenever I want. In other words, I miss summer.
When we arrived home at 3am Wednesday morning, I was greeted to a jungle back yard, there are weeds taller than me growing all over, and the house looks like Hurricane Earl hit here instead of the cottage. It will take me while to get things back in order.
I guess it’s just culture shock, the cottage is so quiet and peaceful and the house is definitely not. The whole city is buzzing with contagious energy. I’ve been having quite a bit of trouble sitting still these days as is. One of my favorite things to do is read, I love to curl up with a good book and be transported to another time, place or life. These days it’s all I can do to take the time to flip through a magazine, so coming back to the city that is buzzing with energy is going to be tough, it’s just going to feed those anxious feelings I have.
It really is amazing to me how easily I slipped into life at the cottage. The sun would wake me up in the morning, very early since it was rising about 530am, sometimes I would get dressed and slip out to walk the beach before anyone else was up, then come back and crawl back into bed to sleep for another couple of hours. Or make myself a cup of tea and sit on the deck and watch the day begin. Sometimes, there’s nothing better than watching the bay wake up for the day. The birds arrive, the mussel fishermen begin their day it’s all very slow and easy but everyone has a routine and purpose. Since the cottage is on the east coast, the time difference is an hour a head of TO. I find that since I was up early at the cottage that I’m up early here, at home as well, it’s 6:15 am right now but my body and brian thinks it’s 7:15 and wonders why I’m not making my way for my walk. The other half of my brain is wondering what I’m doing up at 615 writing my blog instead of sleeping.
My neighbour at the cottage and I had gotten into the habit of going for a late afternoon swim. On one particularly cool day we were floating in the cold water, the sun had ducked behind the clouds, I think I was beginning to turn a little blue, I’m sure I could hear my teeth chattering, when he said to me “pick a street that you walk down all the time at home, the worst one, picture it in the winter time, covered in snow and ice”. Although not a warm thought at the time, the point was, that in the winter time the thoughts of long hot lazy days jumping in and out of the bay would sustain us through the long cold nasty days. I think I’ll pick one of the warmer days to be my sustaining thought, but it did get my mind off how cold the water was for that moment.
In a few days I’ll get use to the rhythm of Toronto again. The busy streets, the people who yell at other drivers, the ability to walk out your front door and have access to any type of food you want, to see any type of entertainment you feel like. I do love it here and don’t think I could live the cottage life year round, it would be too quiet, I need to feel some of that city energy, but it is wonderful to take the time away from it to recharge.
I wish there was an easier way to ease back into city life. However, like swimming, when you’re walking into that water and it’s cold and choppy, sometimes the best way to get in, is just to dive.
Dream Big, home in TO,