Automatic Pilot

It might be time to move up to a level 2 yoga class.  I’ve been under quite a bit of stress over the past 6 months.  I’ve lost a lot of weight, not sure if that’s from the anxiety, the change in diet, dairy is now on the no-no list, the no dessert policy or that I’m doing a ton of yoga, it’s probably a combination of all these factors.

However, yesterday I went to an “all levels” yoga class with my favorite teacher, Pat who usually kicks our butts, and was shocked when the back bends began.  For those of you non yoga folk, back bends usually signal the end of the class, when the teacher begins to talk about bridge pose you’re almost done and usually a silent cheer goes off in my brian.  I had no idea that the hour and half had whipped by so quickly.

It probably didn’t help that I’ve been so distracted that I couldn’t clear my mind to do the class.  The problem that has been haunting me for the past few days didn’t go away, which really defeats the purpose of going to yoga.  It may be time to challenge myself and move up to a level 2 class, there is NO way I’ll be able to get through one of those classes and not be totally present.

Do you ever get this? Where you’re on automatic pilot to the point where you look up and wonder how you got here? It happens quite a bit to me while I’m driving, I’m still  paying attention to the road, just the back ground noise gets blocked out.   Many of my friends ask me if I listen to audio books when I drive out to the cottage, but I find that I need to listen to music, when I listen to a book I tend to lose the plot. 

I think that we live quite a bit of our lives like this, on automatic pilot, chugging along to the rhythms of everyday life.  I look back at the past 10 years of my life, there have been some amazing moments that I will remember forever.  There are so many day-to-day things that take over and that we just do that they melt one into the other and before you know it the week, month, and year have gone by and you look back and wonder what you’ve accomplished.

As I start this next chapter in my life my goal for 2011 is to be happy.  I realize how flakey that sounds but the reason I began this change in my life was because I wasn’t happy with the way my life was heading.  I was on auto pilot and it was slipping away from me, not in a bad way just not in an inspiring one.

So the way to make sure I’m happy is to stay present for my life in 2011, to experience new things or resurrect some old ones. To keep off of auto pilot as much as possible and to find out what they really do in that level 2 yoga class.

Dreaming big from TO,


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