Naive….

A late in the day post today.  Thursdays I teach at 830 in the morning and don’t have time to do a post before I leave for school, so for the next 3 weeks these days will be a little later.

Today was a eye opener for me.  There are days that I realize that I am incredibly naive, it just makes me feel like I’m stupid.  I learned that someone who I thought had become a friend has been bad mouthing me and trying to hurt me.  I’m not clear on the motives and I had no idea that this was happening but there it is.

I’m the type of person, who one of my friends back in TO refers to as “what you see is what you get”.  I trust everyone until they give me reason not to.  I was taught that if you treat people the way you want to be treated, with kindness and respect, that they will do the same for you.  I expect that if someone, a friend or co-worker has a problem with me that they’ll come and talk to me about it. I also expect that people won’t make up lies about me or distort the truth to their benefit……see, NAIVE!

The world really doesn’t work this way does it? As much as I’d like to see the good in people there just are some that seem to think the way forward is at the expense of others, have they never heard of karma?

We’ve all done things that we regret, choices in life and in friends, mistakes have been made by all of us. If you’ve done something deliberately to hurt someone how does that help you? Blaming people for your short comings never works, take responsibility for your actions, make peace with them, apologize if you need to, hope they forgive you,  then move on.

I really don’t want to become the type of person who doesn’t trust my friends, it’s to exhausting to second guess everything I do or say, and really, isn’t trust supposed to be the basis of friendship?  I guess I’m going to have to try to tone down my friendliness and realize that even though I’m offered friendship that everyone has a different idea of what that means.  No wonder everyone says that at “our age” it’s hard to make friends that you click with.

I don’t have to deal with this person anymore, their own manipulations, on other things nothing to do with me, have led them into trouble and karma is a bitch, as they say.  I found out after the fact about all that was said about me and really, it doesn’t matter since the people who were told these lies believed in me, without me even realizing this was happening.

I really don’t want to go through life not believing in people, it’s to hard, so I guess what I’m going to do is stick to my principles, that if I offer kindness, friendship, trust and love that I will receive that back and if I get bit by this, well, I’ll count on karma to do what karma does.

Naive? Maybe….but true to myself? ALWAYS!

Dreaming Big from the East Coast

Samantha

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4 Responses to Naive….

  1. Grace says:

    Samantha, how can I sum this up diplomaticly?
    Oh yes, 1st and far most important ALWASYS be true to yourself and the rest……F@#k it!
    YOU ARE NOT NAIVE!!! I think like you do and trust is the bases of ALL great relationships
    Talking behind ANYONE’s back is just being a coward! You did not lose this person’s friendship
    for this person was never your friend for REAL in the first place.
    All i can think about is, what a big loss it is for this person and you, you will go on because you’ve been the true one.

    • Break Free says:

      thanks! This has happened to me before and I find out after the fact … it’s kinda like I’m just going along – dum de dum – minding my own business and this drama is playing out behind my back …. amazing! oh well like you said not a real friend – the sad part, is that I thought we were just getting to know each other and that it could have been a nice friendship….

  2. oreneta says:

    Sometimes people are just crappy, aren’t they. Glad they didn’t manage to do any harm anyway. Did show you who some of your real friends are though, the ones who believed in you.

    • Break Free says:

      It’s been an interesting ride…never a dull moment in my life I guess….the strange thing is this is someone I just met, have NO idea why they would want to do this to me, there would be absolutely NO gain?!? I guess like you said some people are just crappy!!

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